Unfixable

I'm sorry, there are just some things I can't fix in the pediatric ER.

If your family is wicked dysfunctional... DON'T GO TO THE EC AT 3AM! Are you suicidal? Are you homicidal? Psychotic? No? I can't do anything for you! Actually, I lie - I can help you get an appointment with the friendly neighborhood psychiatric clinic. And yes, if I help you make the appointment, you will get seen sooner than your average schmoe. But really, that's it.

But damn, don't expect me to fix 16-fuckin-years of dysfunction in one 2 hour ER visit.

It might seem like I dislike psychiatry. Not true. I like my psyche-delving friends. However, I hate ER psychiatry - 'cause I can only do two things. Number one - send you to the local mental hospital. Number two - send you home with nothing. Very few people meet criteria for door number one, so most people leave more upset than when they got here.

Lovely, no?

I'd much rather see (yet another) kid with gastro. Puke - generally fixable. Family dysfunction - generally not.