Monday, February 26, 2007


I never thought that I would be a fan of meetings. But there is one meeting I rather like - as a matter of fact, I HATE missing this meeting.

And I'll be missing it tomorrow.

The Section meeting is where rumors get started and eliminated. Policy is discussed and clarified. Nursing issues put to rest. The horse's mouth speaks. Life is much easier when I've been to the week's Section meeting.

But I miss it tomorrow. So I'll be a whole week saying, "Well, last week, nursing was supposed to do BLAH, but I missed the meeting so I don't know what the policy is..." And I hate that. If I'm told "We can't do that because it's policy" then I want to know if the nurse is blowing smoke out of his or her ass.

On another note, I love Battlestar Galactica. I've gotten through to season three. The two hour season opener is nummy. I highly recommend.

Friday, February 23, 2007

Aww yeah

Something odd happened today. Something that hasn't happened for a damn long time. I looked at somethin' on a website that I've seen a million times before - somethin' that, until now, had been sad and lonely. Before today, what I'd been looking at had been small, like an unsatisfying New Cuisine meal. Ya know - a leaf of baby spinach, a sliver of Ahi tuna, a drop of wasabi.

But today, oh Glory, my leaf turned into a salad, the sliver into a steak and the drop into a chunk.

By Goodness, that somethin' was my (MY - not my husband's) bank account. I have MONEY. For the first time in a long ass time, I actually have some cha-cha-cha-change. Okay, it's not Jay-Z pimp money. But it's a damn sight better than the big fat zero I had before today.

'bout damn time. Thank the fates.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

The Meme

Yes, yes, yes... memes are evil, easy ways to fill up blog space. But I like them anyway.

So in that spirit - Six weird things about the doctawife!

1) Almost all of my favorite movies are based on comic books or heavily influenced by them. Examples: Sin City, Batman Begins, Kill Bill Vols 1 & 2, X-Men 2, The Shawsank Redemption, Resident Evil #1 (well, actually the commentary track, but that counts, damn it!) The exceptions: Children of Men.

2) Chipotle restaurant tried to kill me. For real. Dead. I'm not kidding.

3) I wear rude t-shirts underneath my scrubs when I work. Why? It makes me laugh. And yes, I work in a pediatric hospital.

4) I don't like chocolate, and by and large, I don't like sweets. I know this makes me a freak of nature, especially for a female, but there ya go. Give me a nice savory mushroom tart and I'll be much happier than if you gave me a gallon of fine chocolate mousse. Deal.

5) My cat is like an encopretic 5 year old. Look up encopresis to understand just how weird that is.

6) I have read 5+ books per week since I was 12. Unfortunately, the books have always been of the trashy romance or flimsy sci-fi/fantasy kind.

Now I'm supposed to tag 6 other bloggers. I'm not going to, mostly because I'm not sure that six people read this blog, and because of my six favorite blogs, at least two have already done this meme.

So I'm off tomorrow - the first day after three straight shifts. Which is great. I'm gonna sleeeeeeeeeep and then figure out something else to do, hopefully something with the husband. If any of my readers are bored tomorrow, try the Six Weird Things meme.

Thursday, February 15, 2007

I miss baseball!

One of my favorite things that I ever wrote was my "Rules of Baseball Viewing." I reference those rules nearly every day - well mostly I reference rule #1. Rule #1 was "Sit the fuck down."

Rule #1 was created after a rather unique Fenway baseball experience. Sometime early in the 2003 season, Hubbie and I sprung for some wicked awesome seats at Fenway. (The section just behind home plate, but not where the really really rich people sit - just barely behind that.) We got there early, and a huge number of Fenway Faithful were seated around and behind us. No one really in front of us - those were the rich people seats.

The game started, and we were happy. We were at Fenway, the BoSox looked good, it was too early in the season for any of the players to be really hurt, Legal Seafood was selling chowda, and we had beer. Yay for us.

Until, midway through the inning, two women wandered in front of us. Since we were in the middle of the section, this was a feat. I mean, who goes to the center of a section and THEN decides to stop? Oh yeah... these two ladies! And not only did they wander in front of us and stop, they stopped to have a little conference - right there, blocking the view of home plate.

Needless to say, Hubbie and I were annoyed. 30 seconds passed. We hollered a relatively polite "down in front!" Not too loud, just enough to startle someone into action. It didn't work. Next came a more strident cry from the two of us. After all, they were blocking home plate. We couldn't see the pitches! And we'd paid $45 per seat, damn it! But alas, no response.

And then, the crowd behind us clearly gave up on the idea that these two women would buy a clue at Kmart. From behind us (with my own enthusiastic contribution) came a resounding, deafening, "DOWN IN FRONT!"

Next was the amazing part. The women turned around, seemed totally bewildered, and said, "But we're the cousins of the first baseman!" The instant thought of EVERYONE else in the crowd was, "If your cousin is the first baseman for the Boston Red Sox, you all should freaking know better than block the view from the good seats behind home plate, biznatches!"

And in the next instant, we all yelled, in unison, "DOWN IN FRONT!"

But at least for that season, we all loved Kevin Millar anyway. Despite his 'cousins.'

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Two hours

Well, last night was my first overnight shift since resuming work.

Whoo. Dude, I'm tired.

But as usual, it is taking me about two hours to wind down. The two hour wind down used to kind of piss me off - 'cause damn I'd be tired and WHY COULDN'T I SLEEP and why was my mind still running at 8 million RPM and oh geeze was that last kid going to do okay... But recently I started talking to the other ER docs - both those that specialized in pedi EM (aka the 'sub-boards'- remember the term kids 'cause I ain't gonna bother explaining that for much longer!) and other generalists, like me - and most of them need two hours after a shift to cool off. I figure if docs who've working in the ER for 20+ years still need wind down time, I should just get used to my own need to sit and process for a while.

I liked the shift, until 2am rolled around and I lost the company of other attendings. Yeah, yeah, yeah I got help in 'moving the meat' in the form of a fellow (who ruled!) and then a resident, but especially with the resident, it just wasn't the same. I lost that sense of, well, fellowship present between equals slogging through the trenches of the late night ER. The resident just wanted the shift to be over and the nurses all wanted something from me. When there are other attendings there, we throw around ideas and treatment options and personality management strategies and joke... but with nurses, I'm one of 'them' and therefore am not included in the banter. With the residents, well, they pretty much have to do what I tell them to do, which seriously cuts down on the room for small talk. So I kinda got lonely from 2am to 8am.

And six hours is a long time to slog along on my own. Unfortunately, I have a LOT of overnights next month. Then again, I can't much complain because for Pete's sake, at least I'm working! So maybe I'll be able to make the night nurses my buds, and life will get better.

Yup, that's the plan, Stan!

Monday, February 12, 2007

Funny, the things ya remember

I remember there was a blog... and sometimes it was funny. But sometimes it gave too much away.

And now it's gone.

So please excuse the broken link. I'm waiting on the why and the wherefore... and the where if.

If the 'where if' ends up someplace public, I'll fix the link. If not - well, ya'll will never know that it was there. MUAWHAHAHAHA!

Thursday, February 08, 2007

First solo shift

Well, this morning I had my first solo shift. Let me explain - a solo shift is some fraction of an eight hour period in the ER without another doc to help out. Today I had four hours, half of my shift, flying solo. Luckily for me, I had an awesome family practice (aka FP) resident helping me out. Now the educated among you might ask, "Doctawife - you said you were solo. But you had a resident helping - that's another doc!" Well, residents only sorta count. They can see patients, so I can see another patient or write in the chart or call a specialist or whatever... but in the end, I'm ultimately responsible for the patient the resident sees. The buck stops with me, and sometimes, it's a pretty sick buck. And residents are not just in the ER to 'move the meat.' They are there to learn. Which means I have to take the time to teach. And that doesn't help move the meat. That actually slows the meat down.

Now mind, only other well trained pediatricians will understand how remarkable the sentence about "awesome family practice resident" is. Pediatricians generally don't like FPs. Why? As a group, pediatricians think that FPs don't get enough training in pediatrics. Which means they make mistakes. Most of them aren't bad, and don't hurt kiddos. But sometimes, oh sometimes, the mistakes are bad. And for whatever reason, many of the FPs that come through the ER are really terrible. In terms of pediatric knowledge, they're worse than med students, even.

Not this one. She rocked. I taught her about basic pedi stuff, and when the kiddo with the kidney stones came in, she reminded me about those. ('Cause usually 11 year olds don't get kidney stones. I hadn't seen one since med school. The FP resident had seen one the month before in adult-land. It ruled.) And even with the basic pedi stuff, I was more reminding her of common pitfalls than teaching her new material.

Oh, and I told her of common FP mistakes, and why I would beat her with a stick if she ever did any of them. Why the beating? 'Cause she's smart and has no business making any of them.

But yeah, solo was challenging. At one point I was taking care of ten patients. That's a lot.

It felt good.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Work! WORK. WORK work WORK workie WORK!

So yeah, I'm excited about being back at work.

I know, I know, too many exclamation points in one post, but I don't care.

I've worked two 8pm - 12 am shifts and I loved them both. Each shift inspired a different kind of love. The first one (Monday) was slower and a little more laid back. My coworker was the dude (and he is a dude - he's six years older than I am and he still wears his ultra preppy coral necklace) who had clearly established himself as one of my bosses earlier this month; but he was so laid back that, DUDE, what was I worried about? Like, that patient, he could TOTALLY be admitted to the hospital and that would be, like, fine. And I COMPLETELY didn't need to worry about relearning the administrative stuff because I TOTALLY knew who to ask... the nurses, right? 'Cause they TOTALLY have time to educate me... But a medically sketchy idea never made it any further than a TOTALLY casual conversation, 'cause he would just drop the LEARNIN' on me and the patient just got better. Word. Everything flowed, but everything was good for the PEEPS. Pretty dope, huh?

Except when it's totally crazy and the whole ER is on divert and I'm transferring my sickest patient and my other sick patient needs tons of attention from both me and my nurse and holy sh*t the current average wait is six hours and we have 140 patients in the ER and it was only designed for 80 and my senior doc is losing it but it isn't without cause because WHY THE F*CK don't we have suture trays and LP kits on hand and isn't that patient trying just a little too hard to die and WHY did she let her daughter have daily fevers to 104 Fahrenheit for two weeks and why is she AMAZED that her kid is super sick when I'm startled that the kiddo isn't SICKER than she is...

Last night was paragraph number one and tonight was paragraph number two. Day #1 was all about learning and day #2 was all about doing. Both days were fun. I had sicker patients day #2, but that was okay. I'd had some help the day before, so I knew what to do. I'm glad my first day wasn't the day the ER exploded and went on divert. But I'm glad that when things went nuts, I had an awesome, experienced staffer with me to help out.

But it was kinda crazy. And that's why is 3am and I'm not in bed yet. I'm still winding down, and I don't have to work tomorrow. Tonight (this morning? My body really isn't sure.) I'll go to bed and sleep like a baby. It will just take me some time to get to bed.

And then I'll be fine. 'Cause I love my job.

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Theft is good

This act of thievery is being perpetrated against the Ween. Enjoy.


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Not me:

Me:Not me:

Me:Not me:

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